I know I don’t deserve it, but I always have this fortune of crossing my path with some of the kindest and most intelligent souls. Maybe it’s the law of equilibrium, after all, you cannot have dummies like me walking all over the planet. God knows, we already have too many ruling over the world. Remember that ‘Random Thoughts’ post last week which I wonder what is considered ‘overdoing’ it when it comes to BYJ? As some of us feel that this is not a mere hobby or fan craze anymore, his ethics and values have incorporated as part of our lifestyle already. A few wise sisters have so generously shared their golden rules with us :
gosijo – balance
bb – moderation
vegas – choice
heippieh - follow your heart
Thanks also to moichan and mymy for your valuable comments.
A few days ago, I am honored to find one of our most articulate sisters (I dare say) has graced my humble blog and shared her view on this ‘overboard’ issue too. Yes, you guess right, it’s our ‘award-winning’ writer mishio (hehe, in my heart she is). Similar to our HRH's style, waiting for her priceless production causes our neck to grow longer day after day but it always guarantees to be a masterpiece! Thank you mishio for sharing your view :
hey there jaime,
Gotta agree with everyone up there - love the questions you've raised and of courses, the outpouring of sensible and eloquent answers from our super smart sisters. Yea, really just love what bb's written here - it's dead on right.
You know, the fact that someone is aware of these issues is already half the battle won. Like any out of control "addiction" if you will, it usually goes hand in hand with denial.
This whole balance thing - it is a question that I deal with every single day, I kid you not. How can you define a person who is overboard vs. one that is not? Everything is so relative.
It is undeniable that BYJ (or any other interest) has done a lot of good without express intent. In the most extreme, we've all heard of the ladies who've found the motivation and renewed hope to fight certain ills after finding something positive to look forward to everyday. Sure, he's no mighty healer, but the improved mindset he (or any positive hobby) generated cannot be ignored. To those ladies, is surfing 4-6 hours of BYJ news a day extreme if it's doing them more good than not? If I judge them by my standards, a loss of 4-6 hours a day on any hobby would cause my life, as it exists, to crumble. Again, so very relative.
And there are so many extensions of BYJ-ism. Other than keeping up with the "news and action," what about the new friends we've cultivated withing the circle. I'm sure your email box is plumper than it has ever been these days.
The other interests - language classes, travels, aquisition of computer skills, etc, etc keep us busier than ever before. Expanding our horizons in this way - where to draw the line between where the positives end and the negatives begin?
I think the key is to stay grounded and true to our goals, responsibilities, and priorities in life, which are fuzzier for some than others, but that which everyone, if they search hard enough in their heads, is ultimately quite clear.
Each of us have a clear idea of what is truly important and a vision of the ideals that we aspire to. When we start falling short of those purposes in life, whether our own or defined by social standards, it's time to reel back.
Don't know when? Look around - there are hints all around. Like when my dad groans, "what? You choose - it's going to Korea or keeping my last name! Which is it, huh? " (haha, folks, that's once a year!! Dad just exaggerates so much!)
Or friends that whine, "we never seem to see you anymore, so there's so much leftover food on the table." Kids that moan "mom's on a computer date with her Korean hunk again!?" or "why are you decorating my hamburger patty with a ketchup laced BYJ design?" :)
Ultimately, when I sense that my BYJ-related activities are deterring me from crucial steps on my path, you see me shrinking backwards - hence the multitude of absences.
sorry that you had to suffer the consequences of opening that can of worms for me. That was a really stimulating and relevant subject you've raised.
Anyway, please take a step back often as you just had. As long as you keep that habit, you'll develop the proper perspective. Yep, you're ok, sis!
*Dude, been writing for a while now - is it 2008 yet?*
Such 'well thought out' analysis! What I take from mishio is we can try to align our BYJ activities with our goals and aspirations, so we will gain something positive out of this whole experience. There is really no one right answer for all the fans. For a fan who has married children, spending a few hours a day on BYJ may fit perfectly well into her schedule while it would be a luxury for a working mother with young children. For some fans who love traveling and exploring other countries, it is a perfect opportunity for them to learn in depth about the culture of Korea and Asia while other fans might find it more satisfying sitting at home and venture into the world of technology, internet and communications. However we choose to enjoy this BYJ experience, there is one certain reward that no treasure in this world can buy – it’s the friendship and love we gained from our dear BYJ sisters! We’re all winners coming out of this!